The dictionary defines discombobulated as having self-possession upset; thrown into confusion; having your composure disturbed. Currently in a severe state of discombobulation, I could add so much to that definition; being in a constant state of anxiety, carrying a phone around for fear of missing a call, shaking violently when opening the mailbox, sitting or lying down for hours at a time, failing to accomplish one thing during an entire day, checking email every 30 seconds, insomnia, sudden onset of chronic fatigue syndrome, etc.

Why is this happening? I haven’t wanted to blog about what is going on in our lives for fear of jinxing it or being seen as flaky. That makes it sound much more serious that it really is but to me and Michael it is totally discombobulating.

We may be moving. Yes, again. I know, we just moved here two years ago. We love the little ranch life we have built here but this property no longer serves our needs. My struggle with bone disease and spinal stenosis has ramped up seriously since we moved here. The floor plan of this house makes it difficult for me to keep up with activities of daily living. While I have moved a twin bed into my downstairs office, there is no full bathroom or closet on the ground floor. To shower or get dressed I have to climb the stairs. I can plan those activities to limit the number of times I have to climb these steep stairs.

In my defense, Michael has fallen down these stairs too! My nemesis is not these stairs as much as it is the steps on the first floor. Every room on the first floor is on a different level! Absence a crystal ball to peer into the future, we thought the design was cool when we bought the house. Two years later with sciatica these little steps have become the bane of my existence. One step up into the kitchen, two steps down into the breakfast nook, one stop down into the dining room, two steps down into the living room, two steps up to the foyer, one step down into my office. Repeat a hundred times a day for unrelenting hip and knee pain.


Without a reasonable means of getting a full bath on the ground floor or leveling the floors, we decided it was time to look for a forever home.

Our forever home had to allow me to live 100% of the time on the ground floor if need be.  A full bath and bedroom downstairs are must haves. Downstairs laundry, ground level garage entrance, and access to the yard without climbing stairs are also on the list. Even though it is just the two of us we need space in a home. Michael is noisy while I love quiet. I am diurnal while Michael is nocturnal. Michael plays drums, I watch Judge Judy. Michael snores, I sleep hooked up to a noisy oxygen concentrator. We need our own space. We found that single story homes just aren’t big enough without being too pricey. We agreed that a two story would work as long as everything I need is on the ground floor. We began looking a couple of moths ago, submitted a couple of offers, lost out to higher bids and withdrew one offer.

We finally found our forever home, submitted a bid, entered into a contract to close in 35 days on September 28th.  Sounds easy, right? Oh no, not so fast. I forgot to mention that the forever home we found is a farmhouse built in the 1800’s. Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding…………..train wreck ahead. Home inspector freak out, homeowner’s insurer freak out, no county records of date built, septic and well location, etc. Delay, Delay, Delay.  Finally we worked through all those issues, received final loan approval, and removed all our contingencies. We are ready to go.

Oh no, not even close. Turns out that the lender made an error about our tax transcripts being available so they can’t close the loan! What, you were the ones that assured us and our real estate agent that everything was final. How could this happen? Maybe IRS will help us out. Oh heaven forbid, no. It will take 4-6 weeks for transcripts to be available.

So here we sit today. Contingencies removed, $4,000.00 deposit in jeopardy and approximately $4,000.00 spent on inspections and repairs. All will be lost if we don’t close by Friday. We are working a couple of long shots and hoping the seller will work with us but, a deal just recently referred to as “golden” is circling the drain. And we are heartbroken and scared. I have pulled every rabbit out of every hat possible but I may not be able to save this. So for now I don’t post often, I can’t concentrate, I am just weary from worry. I know in the scheme of things this is not a life altering event but it is a discombobulating event for sure. One way or the other I’ll be back. For now bear with me, send positive thoughts that we can move into our forever home, the 1800’s farmhouse we have grown to love even before owning it.

Oh, and I forgot to mention that the farmhouse has cable and high speed internet! I gotta’ go find another rabbit and a hat.

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  1. Kristin says


    I can relate. We just purchased our dream property back in January. We had loan delays, appraisal reviews to no end, a septic tank that was MIA, the bank we were doing our loan shut down the lending department mid escrow, and the seller died on us. It seemed like it was going to blow up on us more often than it seemed like things would work out. Looking back, all I can say is that if it is meant to be, it will happen.

    I will keep you and Michael in my thoughts. I hope you get the house. It looks lovely and perfect. However, if it does not happen, there is something better waiting for you. Just take one day at a time, focus on what you can control, and keep moving forward.

  2. Molly says

    The house looks amazing.. You and Michael are in my thoughts and prayers. If you can think of anyway I can help, Please give me a call Mary. The house and property really looks like it would fit your needs… My fingers are crossed…

  3. Molly says

    The house looks amazing.. You and Michael are in my thoughts and prayers. If you can think of anyway I can help, Please give me a call Mary. The house and property really looks like it would fit your needs… My fingers are crossed…

  4. Dianne R says

    WOW! I can feel your head spinning all the way down here in So Cal! No doubt you have insomnia with your life and lively hood in the hands of the escrow people. Good luck- got me fingers crossed for you.

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